Being a man’s mama

Mistake #2 : Being a man’s mama

I know we're trained to be nurturing and motherlike from the instant we get our first Cabbage Patch baby doll, BUT. If you treat a man like a child, there will be some of it that he will love. Who doesn't want to have a mother to take care of our every need (once in a while)?

But more than a little of that and a man will begin to feel incompetent and you know what? He'll resent you for it. That's right, you.

And if you START a relationship that way, you may be dooming it from the start. Not sure what I mean?

Here are a few examples:

Let him drive.

He's a grown man and he's been making it to specific destinations for a while. He'll get you to the cocktail party, ice rink, or movie just fine without a “mom” in the car. And if he doesn't go the way you think he should, remember that when you're driving, you can choose your own route. It's the early stages. If he's ALWAYS late, lost, or a crappy driver – well, then you'll have some information about him and
you can make the appropriate decisions.

Don't second-guess his food choices.

I know you're thinking, “But I would never do that on a first date!” and yet women do. We say things like, “That sounds kind of heavy; don't you want something a little healthier?” or (and this is the worst one) we scold them over ordering dessert, then eat some of theirs because we didn't order any. Don't scold, don't nag, don't supervise. Be hot-n-sexy. : )

Don't ask how many beers he plans to order.

If he makes poor choices about drinking, better that you know that early on, so you don'’t waste any more of your time. You can always call a cab (or an understanding girlfriend) for a ride home.

Don't ask him if he's warm enough, or if he brought a jacket.

Would you clear up the table at a restaurant because the waiter “forgot”? Of course not. That's the waiter's job. In the same way, you don't need to make sure that a man is taking care of himself. That's HIS job.

You want a MAN, not a boy. So make sure you're a girlfriend (wife, or lover)... but not a mom.

Mistake #1 : Sacrificing or negating who you are

Mistake #3 : When you're not in it to win it

Mistake #4 : When you kill his thrill of the chase

Mistake #5 : Insincere or unspecific praise

Mistake #6 : Ignoring the power of not...quite...saying everything

Mistake #7 : Premature enunciation